Why does making time for pleasure bring up resistance?

One of my dear soul sisters came over for a feast of smoked bleu cheese, farmer’s market peaches, organic vino, to be followed by grilled fish with lemon and oregano (both from my garden) on Sunday night.

As we sat outside around the fire pit, watching the hummingbirds dart around, we were deep in inquiry around how much resistance seems to come up around creating space for a pleasure practice. I see this in women all the time, and in myself.

I call these ‘Radiance Rituals’ and teach these rituals to the women who go through my programs, as a core practice that allows us to care for ourselves as we would treat a beloved, which shifts our energy field into a receptive state–which is where we as women source strength from. Yet, it’s not always easy to give this to ourselves.

So, as my g-friend and I unpacked this more, we realized a lot of the resistance we both felt had to do with our approach.

Approaching pleasure from a linear, masculine attitude felt forced and seemed like just another thing to check off the ‘to-do’ list. Both she and I are very engaged in our work in the world and the need to ‘not do’ is so important.

What emerged from the conversation was illuminating.

Letting pleasure find us, instead of forcing it into our already full schedules, through our inner intentions and being present, and actively choosing in the moment to both move towards and pay attention to what feels good.

Especially, if you’re a single woman who wants to date from a place of feeling empowered, no matter what your circumstances are, it’s essential that you align your mind, heart, body and soul with the vibration and intention of love, as you learn how to interact with men in ways that feel good for YOU.

May this day be blessed with many moments of simple delight and pleasure that are found within the dappled sun shining through the leaves, the fragrance of rose or the yumminess of crisp sheets.