romantic-relationshipI’ve been waking up cranky these past few days. Filled with a low-grade sense of deflation — ‘what is there to be excited about?’ my mind laments.
No big whoops happening. In fact, things are really solid and really good.
My relationship with Nicholas keeps getting more extraordinary, my coaching practice is filled with glorious and amazing people, our home is lovely, and I am surrounded by loved ones.
Sometimes the monkey mind has no clue what to do with this!
I’ve known for some time that my path of learning through life is an experiential one. It’s less about getting the next shiny object that will temporarily create sensation but recedes back into the normalcy of whatever my internal baseline is.
It is the depth-full journey of cultivating the internal spark within myself independent of external influences.
Don’t get me wrong — it is certainly fun to celebrate the wins in the world. It’s fun to play with cool toys (and I am grateful to be blessed with some pretty fantastic toys!) — yet through a yo-yo of attachment and expectancy, I know that my true joy is to be found inside.
When Nicholas and I first got together, it took me a while to settle into how good it was. How easy. How harmonious. There was no super-charged emotional rollercoaster ride.
It took me awhile to actually relax into the goodness that we shared. I then had to relax my fretful approach of anticipating impending doom.
Many women are accustomed to high drama and stress in relationship. We sometimes even create drama as a way to keep ourselves protected from how vulnerable intimacy can feel.
The consistency and stability of his loving presence allowed me to reach into myself and to open the door to my own peace and to walk through it.
The path to Extraordinary Love is one in which we give ourselves permission to relax into the goodness that is, and trust that it is okay.